Shaping Yourself Whole

Think about your beliefs, judgments, interaction styles. Who shaped them? Are they healthy? Do they ease your journey toward your goals or do they contribute by placing barriers, conflicts and negativity in your path?
Wander back into your childhood memories, good and bad.
"This place better be clean when I get home." The "or else" unspoken but likely a combination of psychological, physical and emotional abuse.
Respond quickly to questions with offers of information and assistance. If no one responds quick enough the negative comes like a thunderstorm.

Often, my childhood was being a mine detector learning tools to defuse emotional mines and suffering the scars of failures.

A lifetime later, I still find the programming of my youth winding around my emotional feet tripping me up and stressing loved ones.

I look forward to the day when my mind and heart finally acknowledge Stand Down.  I look forward to the day that I am not scanning constantly, feeling obliged to calm and prevent the emotional storms of others. I look forward to the day the anxiety gets laid to rest for good. Not buried waiting to rise from the ground like a horror movie monster, gone.

The combat Vets I worked with at the VAMC always asked where I served in combat. I didn't. We didn't talk about it. They nodded. They understood. We each have our scars and demons to fight.

I sit thinking about mental and emotional architecture within each of us. The importance of stability as we address the pillars of who we are and how we interact with the world. The words of others that impact who we become, the sorrow that often the wrong words and voices etch deeper than the healthy ones.

I look at what I need to address. The anxiety has been with me since before I could speak. My words came out a smeared mess of consonants and vowels. I have a strong will and years of practice at preventing it from disabling me. It is past time I confront it fully. I can confront it with the present, with truth, with breathing. In the past, this diminished the influence.

I am allowed to choose whether or not to communicate. Other people are responsible for their actions, choices. My thoughts, feelings, actions and choices are my own to have and make without someone lurking with an emotional or psychological bomb.
If an old trigger gets hit, I can choose to pause. To walk away and let it go rather than fall into a defense pattern.

What old patterns are in your architecture that hold you back? What excuses do you use to shore them up? What motivates you to move forward and shift into healthier ways of thinking and feeling?

No one will ever be perfect. We learn from our mistakes, sometimes, we learn from the mistakes made by those who shaped us. We do not need to choose to hurt ourselves or others now because someone thought it best then.

Setting the Mood: Or How Red Jello in Chocolate Sauce can be Terrifying

Remember the old phrase "set the mood?" When I created scenes and coached character creation at haunted houses, murder mysteries, even work training classes it was important to set the mood. What atmosphere? What appearance? What did you want the people you engaged to feel?

 How do you want them to perceive you? What can you do to engineer the sights, sounds, scents, even tastes to create the ambiance you need to make your event a success? Notice the shift: past to present, these considerations are important every day. Consider the difference in the unedited and edited gargoyle pictures below. Quite a difference a little time and effort makes when you approach considering the perceptual outcome you aim to create. 

A local fire department held a halloween party of the town children about thirteen years ago. A safe, free event for the community where they offered halloween themed activities. They wanted to do a free haunted house for the kids. They had costumes and a budget of less than fifty dollars after the candy was bought. They asked me if I could work with them to make it happen. I could use anything in their fire department supplies. Fifty dollars. Why not?
I walked through the fire hall. Picked my entrance and exits. Did we have heavy rope? Yes. Did we have huge heavy canvases to create walls and areas? Yes. We had some tables, weird white christmas lights, gourds, and big pieces of cardboard. It was a farm town so hay bales and heavy gloves were no cost as long as we returned them. Someone gave us several bags of cobwebs with black plastic spiders. Volunteers turned up silver and black and red spray paint. No sound system. No crazy noises. Simple. When it was set up the firemen looked at me. "You sure this is going to work?" I think the guy wielding the chainsaw in a hockey mask said it. It is easier to ask intimidating questions in a mask. The others nodded: the vampire, the gypsy fortune teller, the teenage zombie duo, the crazed coroner who would later be coated with chocolate syrup and red clotted chucks of jello he would randomly wipe off his shirt and eat cackling. He was the hardest one to coach because he did not see how that could be scary while he pulled the bits out of a plastic bag concealed in a scarecrow with a mannequin head.
I knew this question was coming. It is important. It has to be tested. Would my ideas work? The kids were gathered waiting. We went through places and roles, cues and guidelines. Mind you this mismatched group of fiends was getting a pep talk from a gray faced, sharp nosed witch with a scowl that could cut a sword in half. My pointy hat stood tall, the kitchen broom became a magic wand. I called for lights. Darkness fell. Anticipation and anxiety warred in the waiting kids and the questioning volunteers.

The first group of six teens were allowed to enter the narrow black hallway lined with tall oxygen tanks and cobwebs. A heavy gloved hand reached out and touched a shoulder unseen and another. It was a dozen paces. They made it ten. The fifth shoulder got touched and maniacal laugh to trigger the next volunteer was done. The chainsaw revved. The teens turned around and ran back out! The next three groups fared no better. I went from being a roving villain to a terrifying guide. I led the fourth group, that now had a chant. If you are terrified, if you want to push the monsters back so that perhaps you survive long enough for me to steal your soul, then call out "deliver us from evil." The louder you shout, the more of you shout, the more likely it will slow the monsters long enough for you to outrun them. Perhaps." They nodded. They ran through the words, lips moving, making sure they knew them. They entered.
Success! There was a break after all the kids and many adults had gone through several times. They wanted back through, the music of the night was the endless screaming and shouting chant "deliver us from evil." The volunteers gathered, amazed at themselves, amazed at the experience they created together.
Every day we deal with other people and situations. My story was of an external event. Why not apply the same practice to internal perceived events and situations? Do you have to choose to look at a situation or individual as negative? Do you have to be dramatic or antagonistic? Can you change your mood and approach? Instead of approaching with hostility or defensiveness, can you focus on goals and outcomes? Assume the people or situation you are dealing with is not out to get you. Assume instead that if you find the right tact, body language, and approach it will be easier to reach open communication, problem solving, and outcomes that open more doors. The chance for adventure, new friends, new experiences, new foods, different perspectives, new or improved skills could be how you motivate your paradigm shift.
How do you set your mood? What mood and persona do you project out to those around you?

Insert Catchy Motivational Phrase Here

There are easily a thousand motivational phrases. All right and all wrong. What you need to hear may not make it through the radio static of life. Stress comes and goes like a tide. How we perceive and feel regarding events impacts our well-being.

We learn more from our mistakes than we do from our successes.
Last night I stared under the hood of our van staring at the parts. I know some of their names, can monitor fluid levels and jump batteries. I felt frustration well up. I grew up in a mechanic shop. I spent my time spreading sand on oils spills, taping windows for paint jobs, handing tools to my father and the other alcohol sodden mechanics. They were the best babysitters. I behaved for them because I liked the intricate puzzles of metal they labored over. I asked questions until I fully grasped that I wasn't going to get answers. I was a girl. I wasn't supposed to like engines. I wasn't supposed to learn and being a four year old I respected my elders. I feared getting sent to more sitters who yelled, ignored or bullied me. I should have remembered: I ended up at work with my father because the babysitters kept losing me. I hid from them, escaped from them, made a regular mockery of their attempts to supervise me. I still feared being sent to another mind numbing trailer with moronic shows blaring on a cheap television.
If only minds had been open. If only generations of gender roles had not been so strong in that small town. When I got older I worked at a different tree farm. My family wouldn't hire me as "What would people think of we had women on our construction crew?" At the Cooperative, they thought I was a highly skilled, knowledgeable, hard working member of their propagation team. My rooting rates were remarked on. No one blinked at my gender. They did remark on my colorful vocabulary.
My mistake was acquiescence. I grew out of that. Mostly.

I am not comfortable feeling helpless. I am not comfortable feeling like I'm failing. Is anyone really, or do some just put a better mask? My best and worst attributes come out. My demons circle and whisper louder than thunder. It seems like I'm arguing when I'm listening and arguing to get more detail to better equip myself to deal with myself and situations more effectively.

I've been learning. When these situations arise to stop. Focus forward. Problem solve. Think about past lessons. Think about specific friends and situations that remind you to maintain perspective. Find something to ground with, something to work toward.
Who are your supports? Whether they know it or not, take a moment to reach out of your head to check in on friends. Be there in their moment. Give their voices and conversation a chance to work it's magic. There really is nothing like a smile, friendly voice, a gentle hand on your shoulder, or a focused hug.

Many challenges I navigate through are never expressed aloud. Most come from within. It is humbling to realize you are your best support and worst enemy.

This year I had to face the reality that I cared too much for someone who echoed the worst voices in my head. I let their words enhance the destructiveness of my own shadows. I reached a point where I faced myself. I chose to heal. To grow and to listen to the healing, growing, positive voices instead. I chose to invest in myself. If you don't invest in you, if you do not value you, why would others?

I prepared for Shades of Faerie, nervous about my stories and the event. Taylor Grant and Joshua Safford are amazing storytellers. Would My stories be up to muster? Would my character? Preparing for the event, dealing with last minute details the unexpected happened.

I've spent a lifetime mastering flexibility and acceptance. Make do could be my motto. The guy who was going to do video capture couldn't do it. Omar and I were running errands in Tulsa. He broached the idea of picking up equipment and doing video. It would cost us, but it would be an investment. Initially, an investment in my character and career development; also offering us the option of being able to do video work and other projects. Investing in me, investing in him, investing in us.

The show went well. Compliments and performance awards were given to all three of us for the show.

I think about that often. I've been the one investing in me. My great grandmothers, my grandfathers did before they died. Their investments were emotional. This was a financial investment. From the time I got out of sixth grade, I worked. I made my own money. I bought my own clothes, books, toys. I paid my bills and expenses and played every sport well, got top grades. My parents focused on my siblings. They invested in them.

Having someone invest in you gives you a profound feeling if it's something you are not used to.

Who invests in you? What do you acquiese to? Should you?

Each day is a new day, life is challenges and triumphs. Tragedies and comedies in situations and circumstance that chain from second to second. Finding a way to learn from both in part of being human.

Immersed In Sunset

I am on a plane, headed west. The sun started setting as we climbed above the clouds. Listening to relaxing sounds I watched the warm peach, pink and gold tones fill my window. Soothed, my eyes closed. A half an hour later, I was surprised to notice the clouds colors were just as strong. I began to watch, taking breaks to let emotions go, to see them glide like little weeks through the window next to me and into that breathtakingly vast beauty. I thought of friends, letting go of all the frustrations from what I can't change in their lives. I took time to think of their gifts: shared memories, moments, and wisdom. Time passed slowly as it does in the sky.

In my meditation I stood on the wing of the plane, watching the dark little birds gracefully vanish from my heart into the light. I felt the coolness of the rose and gold tinted clouds. The wind went through me, cooling and refreshing.

I did not look back. I looked forward. I remembered how far I have come. The scars I have earned are badges of bravery, foolishness, pride and fear. I acknowledged them. I let them go as well, unravelling like a ribbon back into the darkness, eventually tumbling away.

The sunset lasted over two full hours. Golden, pink, vibrant and full of beauty. I was amazed how few looked out and saw. Most people were wrapped up in phones, laptops, tablets or books. It was like being alone on an island in the sky.

I shed silent tears when emotions came strong. I let them be, just be. Like letting an agitated cat run until it tires and you can calm it. I focused on them. The positive, the negative I just felt for a while. They grew faint, and after I acknowledged them and heeded their communication I shared memories with them that gave them reason to calm. Like a child in a fairy tale singing a feisty Dragon to sleep. Quietly, discretely I tended my heart. The plane was full of people, focused on their worlds while I appreciated the gift sunset was and worked on my inner world.

They say mastering your mind is the hardest task. I disagree. I think for some handling the heart and irrational feelings is far more challenging. Others struggle with being in tune with their spirit, discomforted by the enigmatic, powerful aspect that motivates us to see beyond our own existence: to be aware and consider the wellbeing of others as well as our environment and our connection to it.

Two and a half hours, periwinkle has joined the sunset circle, confident yet shyly hiding the terrain below. Music, binaural tones, nature calls blended together with the sunset colors. My last focus: on everyone below. To be grateful for you, for how far you have come with the burdens you have chosen to carry, to send out the hope and prayer that you have what you need, that you have laughter, friendship and health. I sent up prayers that whatever you all believe, that you all treat each other as human and worthy of respect and compassion.

The next time you are caught enraptured by an incredible moment, I entreat you to live it fully. Appreciate it. Let what is retune you, and return you to yourself.

The pink is almost gone, sky mostly blue grey now. Three hour sunset. What a sight! The plane is slowly descending, shortly we will be on the ground. I will be able to curl up at home tonight, content with my significant other. I will be able to hear my cat do his squeaky purr and wrestle with him. I will hear Gracie make her little night noises. I will hear the coyotes at night, the quail, doves, and myriad of other birds that come to visit Bruce and eat the seeds he offers them in the morning. Tomorrow I will see and hear friends. I live in today, not yesterday. I'm excited about tomorrow but today- today is always when I am! What are you looking forward to? What makes you smile now? Do you have goals or accomplishments to energize you?

Unexpectedly, I found the second I missed New Years. That second was a sunset that lingered for three hours.  Happy New Years everyone! May your year from here forward be full of unexpectedly amazing moments. May you appreciate and share each one.

Who Feeds Your Monsters?

There is a Native American parable about two wolves, asking which wolf is stronger. Which is stronger, fear or courage? The one you feed.

Our minds are virtual worlds we dwell within. On the outside there may be little or no sign of what is really going on in that inner world. There can be great beauty, serenity and healthy forests as well as vibrant gardens. There can be tome after tome of experience and knowledge that we've gathered. Our emotions dwell as ephemeral creatures there. Pure, incredible and each completely different. Elation moves like a feather on a gentle breeze becoming sometimes a leaping deer excited by the freedom to run or a pack of coyotes excited by the anticipation of a tasty meal. Not everything is tranquil. There are places it is better not to tread without the right gear.

There can be scars leaving vast deserts, dangerous shale cliffs that look impressive but may slide us back into scar country. There are monsters as well, darker emotions and thoughts that stalk beneath the sand and water of day to day waiting for the right moment to lash out and reopen wounds we've worked to heal. These monsters in your head are disheartening and exhausting to face. You do your best not to feed them, you build trust with others to let the light in, to weaken their influence through forgiveness, compassion, and love.

You do your best to be aware of them without triggering them, handling them like an old crate of dynamite which has come to life. Part of you feels shame that you can't simply get rid of the damn beasts. You think you've shooed them out, cried them out, fought them out, forgave them out but they spring back to life like a vampire in a B movie. You don't always know how they got there, you can't undo or unlive the scarring that drew them in to feed. You didn't know you were feeding them, until you got older and wiser.

You may have stopped feeding them.

Then they come back. Who is feeding the monsters in your head? It is important to be aware of who you allow in, who you allow to influence your heart, your mind and your body.

Often, without realizing it, people feed the monsters in each other's heads. Some people become living caricatures of their inner inner demons losing themselves rather than fighting. Others disconnect in various ways to maintain stability in their uncertain inner world.

Do your friends and loved ones communicate with you out of love? Do they honor you? What motivates the friendship you have, is it healthy or destructive? Is it real? Do they feed your monsters? Do they even know you well enough to know what you face? Do you know their monsters, do you help them resist and neutralize them or do you feed them?

Which wolf is stronger? The one you feed. The one that our perception of circumstances and the influence of verbal and nonverbal communication combine to feed.

Real, healthy friendships help us face these thoughts and feelings with compassion rather than recriminations or negativity. Believe me, we know how frustrating and disheartening it is to have them rear their heads. It's worse than peeing your pants as a small child in front of a group of people. Humiliation only feeds the monsters. If you want to help, to be a strong, healthy friend, be honest and aware. Be aware of body language, words, and of triggers. The most amazing thing you can do, feed our strengths, feed the thoughts and feelings that combat the monsters. Feed our love, self esteem, self worth, our trust. Affirm what is or what we can heal and grow into being.

The worst thing someone you trust can do is use your monsters for their own agenda or be insensitive to our struggles. Imagine being injured while the people you love and trust do not seem to notice. How would you feel?

Today, consider your friendships, consider the quality of relationship you have with those around you.

Are you feeding their monsters, are you manipulating them into a place where old behavior and thought patterns reemerge wreaking harm?

Are you feeding their inner hero and guardian? Are you planting seeds for a beautiful, healthy person tomorrow? There is nothing as powerful as a truly caring friend in that inner world.

Many people struggle with their monsters  inside without ever giving a word to those around them when they need support. They fight and feed, get exhausted then just feed the monsters in a spiral of self destructive judgements. Be aware, be attentive, and be forgiving, take the time- real friends are worth it.

Today, I ask, who feeds the monsters in your head? Communicate. Express how you feel and what you perceive. If you don't, your friends may not realize they fuel an inner hell. The hard part is, you care for friends and family but they may wound you deeper than anyone else because you open up to them, they may not even be aware of the damage they do- so caught up in their own day to day inner worlds.

Remember:

You are beautiful. You are strong. The past is past. You won before, you can again. Mistakes are accidents we can learn from. You CAN pick who you allow into your inner world, choose wisely.

Focus on how far you've come. Plan actions to heal you, reach out and do what brings a smile back. Even if it starts out weak and tentative. Find something to laugh about. Come up with your own inner mantra, words and images you can use to pick what your emotions feed. Forgive yourself. Get outside your head.

 

It's Not About Sex

What has more power than words? What can calm fear, relieve pain, improve mood, and enhance healing?
I'm not hinting at a drug.
Touch. Human touch.
Yet we have so much difficulty reaching out and touching each other. Our society somehow seems confused about touch, certain that it must be sexual. It isn't and doesn't.

Pushing myself too hard results in pain. Migraines knock me down and remind me I have real limitations. Wednesday I drove almost ten hours and did three intensive gigs. The math is easy. Migraine. It grew on the drive back, I breathed, worked at my neck as I could, drank water, slathered tiger balm and pinched points on my hands to reduce the severity. My eyes watered, Rosemary, riding with me could keep me calm and breathing until we got home. Once there I knew it was bad. My eyes watered, my speech was slow, thoughts like glaciers in a river of lava pushing through my skull. I went through options in my head.

Rosemary, skilled and amazing massage therapist said "Now, I can be in the proper position to address this." She gestured at the chair in front of her. I sat. She worked. Her fingers worked through pressure point patterns and cranial sacral work that no pill, no physician could have done. She silently unravelled something that would normally drop me for twelve hours or more. She made short work of the headache. The only side effect: gratitude and elation.

The next day, free from the prison sentence of pain by Rosemary's touch we headed to King's Sauna and Spa in Dallas. The reason I had pushed so hard: I'd wanted to get there to relax the night before and instead incapacitated myself.
I was still post migraine, nerves still raw and thinking about flaring because once angry the Dragon doesn't go down easily.
At the Spa they advertise scrubs, accupressure massage and other health enhancing treatments. I usually just use the sauna rooms and spend about twelve to sixteen hours soaking in herbal baths, steam rooms, and meditating. Sending out my thoughts and love, intentions of healing to all of my friends and family. Finding and undoing some of the barriers in my own heart and head.
This time, exhausted, I thought of what Danny would say and does say. Take care of yourself. I signed up for a scrub, not knowing I signed up for a truly healing experience.

Haimi smiled and retrieved me from the baths when it was time. Yes, I was nude. I laid down on her table face up. She scrubbed me from foot to neck, her hands in scrubbing mitts. They were like blood hounds rooting out every tight muscle, every area of dried skin. Her hands moved so fast piano players would be jealous. My tension flowed away. Emotional knots unravelled. This sweet, smiling, healing spirit worked as if it was effortless. She worked on each side then sent me to rinse off in the showers. She came and got me, amused because I followed habit and soaped up and had to rinse off again. Then she worked a peppermint oil into my scalp, working and releasing muscles there. She put a towel on my back, climbed up and did accupressure massage. My spine popped into place without a chiropractor, with the muscle work she did. She loosened tendons from head to foot, she found and dealt with trouble areas I hadn't known existed.
She put a collagen mask on my face after she gently massaged the muscles there.
Each touch calmed, released and healed. There was nothing sexual about it.
I found myself wondering why our society is so set on obsessing on touch being sexual. Why touch is so hard and taboo, when in reality it is easy and effective?
Danny's blood pressure goes up when he feels down, I don't even think about it I reach out and touch and massage.
How much anxiety, depression, pain would we suffer if we resorted to touch first rather than last?

Why not be brave enough to try it?
Haimi finished by peeling of the mask, working on my back and neck a little more and smiling. My happy ending was being free of any residual nerve inflammation and being full of peace and gratitude. The experience was far more profound, intimate and nurturing than sex. My muscles and nerves calmed and relaxed, I heard them as they said "Touch. We want touch like flowers want Sun. Need Sun. Need touch." Danny massages me daily at home, we work on each other. Touch, constant and nurturing that improves mood, calms fears, enhances resiliency, releases stress, helps injuries heal and it is as necessary as vitamins.

My mind went back to a study in psychology done in Russian orphanages. There were babies dying without apparent cause. They were fed, they were kept clean. They were never held and rarely touched. They died. The psychological impact of too little physical contact was the death of them. By changing care and adding time each day for staff to hold the babies the death rate dropped. Held, not anything fancier than that.

Think about how often you touch others physically. How often do they touch you?
Consider times you've felt wonderful, during those times was there more physical contact with others, more trust?

The next time you are sore, pained, heavy hearted, anxious consider trading a simple hug or holding the hand of a friend, a platonic backrub, or if you have some cash or something to trade: a professional massage.

Thank the massage therapists and body workers you meet for not being afraid to reach beyond society's screwed up over sexed obsessions to get down to the muscles and tendons, down to the accupressure points to truly heal one massage, one person at a time.

Thank you healers. Always. Thank you Rosemary and Haimi. Thank you.

Life is too Short, Religion as an Excuse for Bias is Absurd

I look outside and see a beautiful world. I do not see the churned up anxiety and jagged edged fears of my friends and neighbors yet those internal emotions and perceptions shape their worlds. If you are looking for me to ridicule religions, I am not. I could but why? The idea is to open minds NOT close them. Religions were created with the intent of bringing people together and keeping society from chaos and abhorrent behaviors. I respect that. Believe what you will, none should be looked down on for their choice. Every religion has embarrassing subgroups from ISIS to Evangelical Baptists; it is important not to generalize, stereotype or belittle someone because they align with a specific belief system.

A beautiful day goes by as we struggle to relate to each other and deal with interpersonal issues, most caused by miscommunication, misunderstanding, perspective differences, or old trauma to vast and marring to permanently escape from. The birds sing, the wind carries tree branches in a merry dance and the stars shine on. We could be a foot away from someone struggling with depression, anxiety or other medical issues. We could be staring at the daisies, marveling at the beauty in this world while they only feel like they have consumed nightshade and are struggling to survive. We worry more about religious fanatics than we do our friends and neighbor's mental and emotional health. Priorities people. ONLY when every choice we make is beyond reproach and respectful of human and world could we start making that judgment call- but someone at that level would never choose to stoop that low unless it was to pick up trash from a beach.

It is hard to bear the burdens some carry in their minds. There is no clear stop to put the baggage down. While we make fun of primitive cultures, they had a better understanding of us as we are. They understood we need rituals, we need symbols, we thrive on coincidence and associations that seem personal to us. Those associations such as with certain animals or seasons give us comfort and encourage us to grow. Without them we become just another number trying to stand out through standardized generic social media, clothing, and haircuts. Look unique just like everyone else…
Yet no one complains that daisies look the same, most smile to see their lovely petals; rarely does someone say "ugh, another plain daisy." Rituals allow us to symbolically let go and grow, they turn scars into symbols of courage. Religions know this and use rituals.

Perhaps instead of telling each other what to believe we should choose to create a "Church" THAT SPECIFIES believing in anything or nothing and respecting the right of everyone to believe and worship as they choose so long as no one is harmed or killed…

Wait, the major religions are constantly arguing as if they were spandex wearing wrestlers.  IT should not be about right or wrong, all religions were created by people just as human as we are. It should be about being connected, finding and keeping peace and health. It shouldn't be about good or bad as they are arbitrary constructs.

Spiritual beliefs are personal, they should be respected regardless of whether one is following Allah, Jesus, Buddha, Cthulu, or the Great Spaghetti Monster in the Sky. Any tithing should go to charities of your choice from the homeless on the corner to saving abused animals, to environmental clean up to doing a potluck with your neighbors. There should be no church buildings, as one should deal with the world and each other in accordance with their beliefs regardless. There is no hypocritical forgiveness card to punch on sunday so you can do something wrong again monday. Instead you are connected and respectful, helping where you can-when you have excess and the need is out there for something you can offer. Perhaps it is picking up litter or helping a lost child find their parent, perhaps it is helping a neighbor with a bill or giving nutritious food to those without.

Instead of approaching from what you can't do and assuming you are flawed perhaps we start as neutral and allow our choices and outcomes to determine where we are at. We choose. Positive and negative repercussions come from our choices, Karma and social law. Teach children values without bias based on another's beliefs, culture, color, gender, or income. No war should be considered holy. No murder or manipulation is justified by religion. No religion should be justified by murder or manipulation.

If you find peace following the tenets of being a Jedi, then do it just don't bang on the neighbor's door and suggest there is something deficient in them because they don't. It comes down to respect. The world was not created for us to trash like giant toddlers. It is. It was. It will be. It is up to us to choose our own paths, to live and appreciate what we have. We have the hours, minutes, seconds between screaming and squalling as we are born until the moment our last breath slips free.

In life we have the choice to get out of our own heads, to fight past our dark inner demons and fallacies to become something more. The ancient alchemists never sought gold. They were considered heretics by all Churches. They wanted to find a way to take what we are as humans, and make it into something more.

Red Rock Lake, Colorado

Perhaps we started as something more and through all the perceived emotional and physical trauma we carry, we end up being something less. Perhaps the key is letting go, accepting, and choosing to heal. Negative tends to be overwhelming, it isn't easy to learn to step out of it. Emotions are strong and painful, like trying to learn algebra while an elephant crushes your foot. Sometimes you have to heal as best you can afterwards and choose to plan to try to avoid or accept painful situations will come and that the most you can do is prepare and perhaps live to tell the tale.


So, today is a beautiful day and I wonder what you are choosing to do with it? You could be guiding someone out of a dangerous place in their own head. You could be resting in a natural hot spring or splashing in a pool or rescuing a lost pet. Each day is time slipping past you that you will never get back. What shapes the landscape in your mind, what monsters do you allow to maim your growth and relations? Why?

ValleyView Hot Springs, Colorado

Finding Peace : combining years of working in mental health with storytelling to offer tools for positive growth and change.

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